I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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