Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?

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(817): View more from Texas

you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag

(817): View more from Texas

could you get any more awkward?

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(812): View more from Indiana

I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(419): View more from Ohio

Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.

(478): View more from Georgia

Moment of silence for the loss of that option.

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(585): View more from New York

Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..

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(206): View more from Washington

I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.

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