you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?