went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
