Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
