Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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