Texts From Last Night

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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.

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  (901): All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name. http://tfl.nu/tyab
  Replies (29) Good night (5408) Bad night (754)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.

  (1-913): View more from Kansas

  You're the best girlfriend ever.

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  (913): Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat. (1-913): You're the best girlfriend ever. http://tfl.nu/imen
  Replies (144) Good night (40389) Bad night (1528)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.

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  (570): I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it. http://tfl.nu/aapx
  Replies (26) Good night (3538) Bad night (933)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.

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  (630): She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her. http://tfl.nu/01f3
  Replies (12) Good night (5724) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.

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  (701): I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America. http://tfl.nu/w2zj
  Replies (19) Good night (4287) Bad night (1284)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.

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  (404): She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves. http://tfl.nu/q9n8
  Replies (26) Good night (4754) Bad night (737)
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  (925): View more from California

  I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.

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  (925): I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible. http://tfl.nu/f1y0
  Replies (7) Good night (3885) Bad night (829)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.

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  (917): You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door. http://tfl.nu/b3vl
  Replies (8) Good night (2305) Bad night (1087)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by

  (256): View more from Alabama

  he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch

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  (256): hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by (256): he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch http://tfl.nu/0lqj
  Replies (13) Good night (2021) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (+66): View more from Thailand

  Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.

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  (+66): Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees. http://tfl.nu/3h4e
  Replies (10) Good night (2267) Bad night (649)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals

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  (773): Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals http://tfl.nu/fp9n
  Replies (5) Good night (674) Bad night (633)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater

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  (717): Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater http://tfl.nu/z0ly
  Replies (3) Good night (417) Bad night (739)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number

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  (206): Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number http://tfl.nu/qktl
  Replies (2) Good night (414) Bad night (294)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man

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  (248): Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man http://tfl.nu/pjf5
  Replies (0) Good night (283) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.

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  (443): I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up. http://tfl.nu/vhgn
  Replies (1) Good night (675) Bad night (191)

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