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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer

  Fav 40 4496 959

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.

  Fav 42 2164 6395

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• (813): View more from Florida

  He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.

  Fav 16 982 4437

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (786): View more from Florida

  Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route

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• (516): View more from New York

  I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.

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• (315): View more from New York

  Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.

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