He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Randomize
