maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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