So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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