Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
