I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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