If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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