just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
