just survived the first fart of the relationship.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
