omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
