Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
