my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
