she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
