Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
