Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
did you just send me my own nude
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
