My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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