My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
and she was petting her beer can
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
