I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Alive.
So much puke
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize