I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
