You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need moral support for this bender
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize