Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
This is classic penis vs brain.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize