Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
