Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
