Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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