Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
