Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
