bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize