Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I just want to make out with him forever
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
