Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
