I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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