Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You have to summon your inner elephant
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
