doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize