I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
