Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Also, beer. Big fan.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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