the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
