Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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