I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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