i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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