dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Still dying that you shit outside
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Randomize