i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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