There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
