Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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