Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
