You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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