I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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