i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
